The sad news reached us on Wednesday: Gerald, the beloved goldfish of the Hollis household, has died. The wake is Saturday. Dress codes are ambiguous. We are here to help.
Wear black, or at least a deep charcoal, with a restrained collar in matte velvet. No bells, no jingles and certainly no scarlet. A small bow tie in midnight is appropriate, as is a quiet expression of sorrow. Under no circumstances should you linger near the bowl. The wearer must stand at a respectful distance, fold his paws and think about the water. We offer a loan collar, ‘The Mourner,’ for 12 treats.
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